Idols Rewind – Chapter 26: I’m doing this

Team Lead Na would join a few days later due to issues with the handover process and processing of his resignation. Before he joined, I received some good news. 

Jin-ah’s choreography was complete. It was strange, though. Even though she brought good news, Yoon-jung wore an awkward expression.

“What is it? Is the choreography not that good?”

“No. It’s not that… The choreography is really good. It’s really, really good. I kept getting ideas, so I modified it several times with the choreographers.”

Oh, I think I understood why she looked that way. It went without saying.

“It must be difficult.”

“Yes… There’s hardly any room to breathe, and the difficulty level is really high. I think we might need to downgrade it a bit… but the choreography is so good that I can’t find anywhere to adjust. It feels like a waste to give up any part of it.”

If Yoon-jung was saying it was difficult, then this was no ordinary problem. No matter how well Jin-ah could show off her strong vocals while dancing, she didn’t have superpowers. She had a limit.

To put it another way, Jin-ah had well-balanced attributes that were ideal for an idol. However, Yoon-jung was still this worried even though she specialized in dance. That meant this wasn’t a problem that could be solved with a simple ‘she’ll pull through.’

On top of that, the song had multiple high notes one after another. It was easy to see how difficult it could be.

“Let’s take a look.” Which part we should downgrade, I finished in my head.

We sat at the office desk with the computer and played the video in question. Yoon-jung, who was playing the role of ‘Jin-ah,’ stood alone in the center. She was surrounded by six choreographers while the rest were kneeling on one knee.

Soon enough, the music started to play. As the choreography progressed, my brow gradually furrowed. By the time we hit the first verse’s highlight, my mouth dropped open. By the dance break, I was staring at Yoon-jung with wide eyes as if to ask, are you serious?

Yoon-jung averted her gaze with an awkward smile. But that wasn’t the end.

At the second verse’s highlight, I even let out a dry laugh. By the outro (with the second dance break), I couldn’t even laugh.

“Yoon-jung.”

“I know… It’s ridiculous, right? The choreographers got so excited, but even they were thinking that this didn’t seem right after making it. S-Still, we can probably downgrade it. Probably…”

Downgrade it? Where? As Yoon-jung said, the choreography was killer. There was nowhere to cut, and it seemed like a waste to give up any part of it.

Both ALTO and Yoon-jung must have felt the same way, which is why she showed me this video. They must have had a reason for showing it to me, even though they knew how tough it would be to perform live.

I squeezed shut my eyes shut.

‘Jin-ah’s strength is her strong vocals while dancing,’ I thought to myself.

It wasn’t just her appeal as a dancer, but her charm as a dancer-singer. If she performed this choreography, she would have to give up her greatest strength.

I understood their feelings completely, but considering Jin-ah’s biggest advantage, it was right to let it go.

“Yeah. Downgrading… we should do that. Somehow.”

“What part should we tone down?”

“…”

I watched the video again, intensely focusing on the highlights of the first and second verses and the dance breaks in the middle and the end.

I wondered if there was even one part we could keep. However, the feeling I had the first time was right.

‘If we try to keep even one part, it’ll be neither here nor there.’

We had to give up everything. The choreography was so perfect it raised my standards for future content, but there was no other choice.

“All of it. We need to downgrade all of the highlights and dance breaks.”

“Okay… I understand.”

Yoon-jung said she would relay my words to ALTO. That evening, Yoon-jung watched the video again with a torn heart. No matter how many times she watched it, it seemed too much of a waste to throw it all away.

At that moment, Jin-ah came into the room, having finished her vocal training and practice. She hadn’t even gone to her room or washed up.

“Yoon-jung! When are we getting the choreography?”

Jin-ah ran over with a big smile. Normally, Yoon-jung would’ve shouted at her to go wash up, but today, her heart was too conflicted.

“Hey. Why do you look so down? Did something happen today?”

“…”

“What happened! Who was it! Which guy! Hee-yeon! Yoon-jung’s been– mmph?!”

Yoon-jung clamped a hand over Jin-ah’s mouth, her eyes trembling like an earthquake. Jin-ah’s face went pale as she met Yoon-jung’s shaken gaze.

“Mmmmph! Mmph!”

“Be quiet.”

“Mmmmmmph! Mmph!”

“The choreography’s done.”

“…Mmph?”

As Jin-ah’s frantic struggle ceased, Yoon-jung wiped her wet hand on Jin-ah’s clothes with a sigh.

“This is so wrong.” She groaned in frustration. “Seriously.”

“What is? Why? You said the choreography’s done. What’s wrong?”

If Jin-ah saw this, how would she react? If she showed it to Jin-ah and she insisted on doing it, wouldn’t that go against the President Kang’s wishes? Her mind’s scale swung back and forth, unable to find balance.

“Yoon-jung! Why are you acting so weird? Hm? You’re actually making me nervous! Why aren’t you saying anything?”

Jin-ah had practiced with Yoon-jung for a long time. They shared the same dreams and worked hard together. Yoon-jung sincerely wanted to succeed with her.

You never knew what would happen. Maybe, just maybe.

“I’ll show you, but don’t get too carried away. Even President Kang thinks this might not be the best idea.”

“?”

“Haa,” she sighed. “I really shouldn’t be showing you this.”

Not knowing how brightly Jin-ah’s talent would shine, Yoon-jung hesitated.

Jin-ah’s expression dramatically changed as she watched the choreography. By the end, she looked determined.

“I’m doing this.”

***
Early in the morning, Yoon-jung and Jin-ah went into the office. Jin-ah was staring straight at me while Yoon-jung had her head down, fidgeting with her fingers. The situation here was obvious. 

As I let out a deep sigh, Jung-han asked curiously, 

“Why are you two here?”

They didn’t answer.

I casually asked Jung-han, “How about you take Yumi and Hee-yeon to the practice room?”

“Oh… Okay, boss.” Jung-han quickly picked up on the situation and left. 

“I can do it,” Jin-ah said. Her gaze and voice were full of sincerity and determination.

“You can’t.”

“If I practice, I can.”

“Maybe if you practice for about seven years. Or if we go half AR, you could do it now,” I spoke calmly as I held Jin-ah’s gaze.

(T/N: AR is audio recording. Lip syncing, basically.)

Who wouldn’t understand how she felt? I also thought long and hard about it. I decided to give her a shock. After all, it was impossible to show her what she would be like in the future.

“Think about it. If we went half AR, don’t you think Yoon-jung would do a much better job?”

“!!!”

“!!!”

“If you lower the difficulty a little, you can be the best. But if you get too caught up in the dance, you’ll end up second best. You need to chase both.”

Of course, she knew what I was saying. She just wanted more.

Her mindset as a rookie was commendable. It was better to say that you would give it your all than to say you couldn’t do it after seeing a choreography like that.

However, the reality didn’t change. Maybe in seven years, it would be possible. For now, though, it was too high of a hurdle for her.

“The new choreography will be fine. Don’t just assume it’ll be bad. Trust ALTO and Yoon-jung,” I added, trying to soothe her.

“…”

Jin-ah bit her lip, her eyes red with frustration. I could feel her genuine desire for success and to put on the best stage possible.

She must have felt upset. She should be upset. She had to be upset.

Maybe this situation wouldn’t be as harmful to her as I thought. It could fuel her ambition even more.

“Can’t I… at least give it a try? It’s because I really want to do it, President Kang. Please. I really want to do this.” 

Her voice was filled with desperation.

“I don’t want to give up without even trying. Let me try it for myself. If I realize I really can’t do it, that it’s too much for now, I’ll give up without any complaints. I promise. Just let me try.”

Even if a miracle happened, she wouldn’t be able to perform this choreography while delivering solid live vocals with her current skills,.

No matter how hard she tried, the impossible was the impossible. At this point, I found myself at a crossroads.

Eventually, Jin-ah would have to give up. Should I let her at least attempt it, or should I stop her from even trying? I rubbed my forehead as I considered both possibilities before finally making a decision.

“Alright. But promise me you won’t push yourself too hard. I’ll check on you every day, and if you burn out even once, you won’t be allowed to attempt it again.”

“Thank you.”

I had decided to teach her how to let go. Or rather, to give her a goal that looked further ahead. 

If you had the talent, it was better if you aimed higher and farther.

***

Yoon-jung and Jin-ah went to see ALTO together. Ah-young didn’t take her eyes off Jin-ah as she listened to the whole situation.

“Okay. President Kang said it’s impossible, but you want to try anyway?”

“Yes. I want to try.”

Ah-young sighed, feeling a bit reluctant. It wasn’t like she hadn’t expected this. She just felt bad for putting Hyuk in a tough spot.

“Ms. Ah-young. Did I go too far?” Yoon-jung asked. She could fully understood how Jin-ah felt. This choreography was just too good to throw away without even trying.

“No, I wouldn’t say that. You did well. I also think it’s better to have no regrets. Isn’t that why you told her?”

“Yes, but… I feel really bad for going against President Kang’s wishes.” Yoon-jung’s expression was full of guilt.

On the other hand, Jin-ah’s determination was practically shining through. She knew that if she succeeded, everything would work out. She just had to pull it off.

Ah-young called over a choreographer and assigned them to Jin-ah, who followed them with a determined face. Jin-ah stood in front of the mirror, talking with the choreographer.

Ah-young finally responded to Yoon-jung’s question.

“Yoon-jung, you don’t need to feel guilty toward President Kang. Jin-ah is just giving it a try, and we’re focusing on what we need to do. We’ll adjust the choreography and get it approved again. Jin-ah gets to try, and when we adjust it, she can practice the new version. Nothing changes.”

“Oh. I see…”

Ah-young changed the subject. There was no point in digging deeper, and as she said, it was time to focus on their roles.

“President Kang asked us to lower the difficulty for the highlights in the first and second verses and the dance breaks, right?”

“Yes. He said it would still be fine if we made adjustments there.”

“Right. It’s just…” Ah-young sighed. “Why did I do that? I guess I got too carried away. He said her live singing was her strength, but I got too focused on making the dance and… Well, let’s tone it down and make sure she has enough room to sing.”

Adjusting the choreography itself wasn’t that difficult. The problem was that the overall feel of the performance would be diminished.

“If you have to give something up, do it cleanly. If you try to hold on to even one part, you might lose everything.”

Ah-young, some other members, and Yoon-jung began reworking the choreography, step by step.

“Two, two, three, four! Tat, tat-tat! We should simplify the steps here like this.”

“Ba-ba ba-ba-bam! Ba-ba-bam! Three, four!”

“That’s good. Let’s take out the sitting part next.”

Adjusting the choreography was going smoothly, but the mood was different from before. When they first created it, there was energy and excitement. Everyone pitched their ideas. Now, it was all about ‘How can we make this easier?’

In a way, this was the more professional approach, unlike when they had lost themselves in excitement before.

As they made adjustments, Yoon-jung kept sneaking glances at Jin-ah practicing in the corner. Jin-ah’s eyes were full of determination as she checked herself in the mirror, clearly set on succeeding.

“Yoon-jung, what are you doing?”

“Oh, right.”

Ah-young saw where Yoon-jung’s gaze was directed at and pretended not to notice as she continued to adjust the choreography.

It took forty minutes to finalize the rough dance. Looking at Jin-ah, it seemed like she memorized the choreography and was now focusing on the details.

Yoon-jung watched her with a mix of pity and regret. Maybe it would have been better if Jin-ah hadn’t known anything.

“Yoon-jung.”

“Yes.”

“Time to work on the details.”

“Right, I’m sorry.”

Yoon-jung took one last look at Jin-ah before turning away. That last image of Jin-ah stayed in her mind like a still photograph.

“Huh…?” Her eyes widened as she quickly turned back to look at Jin-ah.

“Yoon-jung!”

“Ms. Ah-young…”

Maybe. An idea flashed through Yoon-jung’s mind as she watched Jin-ah practice. Thoughts of Jin-ah’s strengths and the possibility of ‘what if’ came together to form a plan.

Yoon-jung focused on Jin-ah’s breathing and expression. What started as a faint possibility began to take shape. Ah-young noticed the serious look on Yoon-jung’s face and followed her gaze.

“Ms. Ah-young, about Jin-ah.”

“Hm?”

“She may lack strength, but she’s flexible and has a good bounce to her dancing. Look at that.” 

Just as Yoon-jung finished speaking, Jin-ah slid sideways from a sitting position, stood up smoothly, extended her arms diagonally, leaned back, and then moved forward again with a slow pop starting from her left shoulder.

Watching with Yoon-jung’s words in mind, Ah-young couldn’t help but say, “Oh?” At that point, she arrived at the same conclusion as Yoon-jung.

“Ms. Ah-young, she’s only practiced for forty minutes. She just started practicing. But she moves so naturally when she goes from sitting to standing, back to leaning, and then moving forward again. Doesn’t it look effortless?”

It was as she said. Jin-ah lacked power, but she had flexibility and bounce. 

Dance moves that required powerful movements or popping would require more breathing. Meanwhile, other styles like waving and animation could be performed effortlessly enough for the audience to watch comfortably.

That meant instead of modifying the choreography to make it ‘easier,’ they could create something that might be ‘harder’ – or just as hard – for others, but perfectly suited to Jin-ah.

“Oh! You’re right.”

“There’s definitely a big difference in the details.”

“I think it’s clearer now because she hasn’t practiced much yet. We can see what’s easy for her and what’s hard.”

“If it’s like that, then maybe…”

Yoon-jung and Ah-young continued to talk while watching Jin-ah. The other ALTO choreographers also started to pay attention to her.

Like that, everyone came to the same realization. The choreographers’ faces lit up with smiles. They were only focused on modifying the choreography out of obligation before, so the atmosphere shifted in mere moments.

It felt like they could enjoy brainstorming ideas again, just like when the choreography was first created.

“How far can we take this?”

“Should we make it more difficult? She doesn’t seem to struggle much with it.”

“But wouldn’t that be… a bit tough? Actually, no, maybe we should give it a shot?”

By this point, Jin-ah had stopped practicing and turned to look at them. She could see the group’s reflection in the full-length mirror and noticed how they were actively discussing something while looking at her.

Jin-ah tilted her head, puzzled by what was going on. With a bright smile, Yoon-jung raised her voice.

“Hey! What are you doing? Get over here, quick!”

“Huh?”

“Let’s do a small human experiment!”

“…What kind of crazy talk is that?”

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